DailyRacingRag.com - October 2013

MARSHA BLACKBURN WORK IT Bi*CH! is the new release of Billionaire Records recording artist and Tennessee Republican Representative Marsha Blackburn. She's an all white and sexy sixty-three year old tea drinker who is on a nationwide talking points tour with the designated task of Obamacare misinformation. Rupert Murdoch and one of the Koch brothers are very smitten with the blonde bombshell from Nashville despite the 17 year age difference. The Kochs want her to pitch their adult diaper products after her political career is over.

ANIMAL PLANET'S POLITIC ANIMALS follows New Jersey Governor Chris Christie on the campaign trail in his bid to be reelected. Christie who was once the tea party and conservatives favorite but isn't anymore has been forced to reach out to voters outside of the FOX news right wing anarchist tea party bubble since tea party tactics like the federal government shutdown are wildly unpopular in New Jersey.

NRA's LEAD CHEF visits Iowa this week as Senator Ted Cruz and Iowa Representative Steve King kill some caged pheasant with shotguns and then wait while Shoot N' Fry fry cooks deep fry their bagged birds. Meanwhile their hungry tea party entourage applauds every shotgun blast as well as round after round of Ted Cruz buckshot insults at other Republicans, non-hunting liberals and of course Obamacare. Cruz is on a celebration tour claiming victory after instigating the federal government shutdown that wasted billions of dollars and accomplished nothing.

TEA PARTY HOMECOMING starring Ted Cruz and Sarah Palin has received rave reviews but possibly for the wrong reasons. This is no political movie but rather an complicated emotional gut-twister and pitches as "Carrie Meets Fatal Attraction". Sarah Palin's body double is worth the price of admission and negates any subconscious objections to the eerie way Palin delivers her unique-as-a-unicorn dialog.

ALL IS LOST starring Ted Cruz is now playing primarily on MSM-TV but has been made available to all non neo-facist television networks around the country. A totally false narrative promoted by an intimidating Ted Cruz led his cult followers to expectations far beyond reason or even sanity and so it felt like the sky had fallen when reality dashed all hopes of victory and nearly dented the Texas Senator's monumental self love.

STAR WORMS - RUPPA THE SLUGG is a science fiction take on a future with an omnimedia controlling all human thought similar to what Rupert Murdoch has created in the present at FOX News. Humans have proven willing and eager to relax and turn all thought and mental processes over to Omnivision 4D. For entertainment purposes it is out-of-body crazy fun but this movie also illustrates troubling consequences.

With the matter of the Tea Party economic suicide shutdown pushed aside temporarily BGN/Beer Goggles Network launches a provocative new interview series appropriately titled BEER GOGGLES utilizing the network's patented BGC/BeerGoggleCamera and beer fueled interviews of women or men important enough to sell books on FOX opinion news shows as well as an occasional truly important person. This season Ann Coulter appears to promote her new book "Never Let A Liberal Lick Your Bookend", private citizen Hillary Clinton allows the BGC/BeerGoggleCamera to follow along on a shopping trip to Walmart and Sarah Palin makes a forceful stand to insist a Veterans War Memorial remain open for visitors until normal closing hours.

AT WORLD'S END AGAIN is the sequel to the prequel and once again the action finds Captains Harry Reid and Mitch McConnell searching desperately to find a sea lane by which to escape the whirlpool they keep sailing around in circles. This time both Captains are on the same ship and tensions are incredibly high because of a mutinous tea drinking crew and the fact that half the world's gold and treasure is in the cargo hold. A sinking could spawn a tsunami sized economic ripple effect worldwide. Only On Bermuda's Triangle TV Network.

McGRUFF in WILL WORK FOR BISQUITS features McGruff as one very angry crime dog. McGruff was furloughed because the Tea Party Republican government shutdown. With time on his paws McGruff sniffed out the paper trail until he came to the realization that the Tea Party was an invention of one billionaire who provided $1 billion dollars in on air promotion of lies and damned lies. Just as in Australia and previously in the U.K one particularly evil billionaire has successfully conspired to bring down the government and a frustrated crime dog McGruff is near his barking point.

IN CASE OF NO CLUE is the latest in the timeless detective series as Sherlock Holmes attempts to help befuddled Republicans who have been flummoxed by the impossibility of convincing anybody that their billionaire's wet dream budget plan is anything but a people destroying destructive mean clusterfuck of anti-American ideology in the service of pure greed by the worst of the omnipotent few who own America. New polls show that 76% of Americans now have a negative opinion of the Republican Party and that number is increasing with each new poll.

In this movie John Boehner agrees to guest host LETS MAKE A DEAL. World famous for his negotiating skills John Boehner will get a three week guest hosting gig to show off his bargaining prowess and to practice his television sales chops as future spokesman for Bounty paper towels and Koch Industries. Boehner's special guest host appearance could start as soon as the federal government reopens.

TEATANIC SINKING chronicles the movement of the behemoth vessel from construction in the Koch Brothers Great Lakes shipbuilding yard to it's destruction and sinking in the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of Virginia. Nearly all the Teatanic crew and Tea Party passengers perished politically in an action adventure many moviegoers may see as a breath of fresh air. Heritage Foundation board members put on dresses and commandeered a lifeboat to survive in a gripping scene near the end of this RINO produced epic.

MOBY JAWS - A BIG FISH STORY is the movie about some oversize claims that two fishermen made up and then told far and wide from port to port and sea to sea until fear overtook many fearful fishermen and their frightened families but in fact the stories where just big fish stories and calm eventually reclaimed the country.

DUMB AND DUMBER IN WASHINGTON D.C. arrives just in time to lighten the mood before suicidal Republicans force the United States government into default in order to protest Obamacare. While the pair's movie shenanigans are outrageous they are no less outrageous or dumb than their recent actions in real life.

Inspired by real life events producers from two hit shows have announced a merger and intend to produce a brand new spin off series entitled BREAKING BOEHNER CRIMINAL MIND in which a prominent conservative Republican politician played by John Boehner as himself drinks the tea and goes beyond mad loses his soul and to be sure... mayhem ensues as atrocities accumulate.

THE BOEHNER ULTIMATUM is now playing on the FOX WHITE CHANNEL and in the bubble. An embattled Speaker Boehner agonizes over his predicament but has no empathy left within him and ultimately decides to murder his hostages. Boehner then goes berserk when he finds out his weapon is loaded with cartoon blanks. Boehner's rage is unleashed and millions of lives are potentially threatened.

JOHN BOEHNER'S BIG BANG THEORY is now playing on the FOX WHITE CHANNEL. Speaker Boehner swears he'll never bring a knife to a gunfight and intends to negotiate as tough as a suicide bomber itching to die. Boehner says he might slaughter hostages like sausages if he doesn't get his way. If you like way over the top drama this show will have it as Boehner's motorcycle jumps the shark in the opening scene.

Romney Popularity Plummets Out Of Orbit! Exiled landslide loser may join asteroid belt. Mitt Romney's popularity numbers have continued to fall like lead bricks since his humiliating defeat on election day. November 28, 2012. Astral Ejection News

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Al-Awlaki's Final Seconds On Tape!
Hellfire missile finds American-born terrorist in Yemen desert.
Anwar al-Awlaki was humming along in his just-washed 1988 Mercedes Benz on the main highway crossing the hot Yemeni desert in the Al Jawf region and talking jihad with Samir Kahn, his webmaster and only other known American-born al-Qaeda terrorist, and then...Byaaaaang! He's soot. President Obama announced the development adding we've run out of influential American-born radical al-Qaeda terrorists to vaporize.
October 6, 2011. Yemen Blockbuster Video.