|DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL EDITION - Summer previews of new TV shows and movies!|
|The O channel will debut a two hour documentary END OF WATCH II about ending the Drug War on American people. Attorney General Eric Holder has issued new guidelines for federal prosecutors to no longer prosecute legal marijuana dispensaries of any size and declared the Justice Department would not challenge in federal court the 20 states that have legalized marijuana for either medical or recreational use by adults. Countless polls have shown majority support for the long awaited new policy of the federal government.|
|THE SMITHSTONIAN CHANNEL celebrates the official hanging ceremony of Donald Trump's portrait in the Washington D.C. national art gallery of America's most notorious gangsters, fraudsters, embezzelers and con men with a HD television documentary and biography of Trump's life and multitude of alleged financial crimes. New York's Attorney General claims $40 million dollars in fraud was committed in his state alone.|
|THE POLITICOWS is new animated TV series from Pixfarm Productions. The characters are all right of center cows who discuss Republican politics while doing dairy cow things like eating and getting milked. In the opening episode Mitch Milker is worried and senses things may be near the tipping point when a neighboring Arabian horse farm owner imports an expensive breeding bull from Egypt named Holsteen Moobarak.|
|THE NAME GAME is another new TV game show. Contestants are allowed to change their legal name to any name they select so long as they can do it in rhyme to Shirley Bassie's Name Game/Banana Song within 30 seconds. On the premiere episode Charles Manson unexpectedly changed his name to Charles Krauthammer and became automatically eligible for the semi-finals.|
|THE 100 TRILLION DOLLAR PYRAMID is an updated version of an old favorite TV game show. The contestants are always pleasant and often delighted to discover that common sense and concern for the common good of all people is quite often the most profitable and rewarding path available. Due to a conflict with currently miserable FOX ownership the popular game show is unavailable on any FOX stations.|
|A` PLUS TARD (see you later) JESUS MURPHY! THIS HOSER'S HAD THE BISQUIT is a Canadian-made film about an ungrateful Canuck born bastard of a bombastic Cuban bully and a light skinned Cuban mother with fraudulent U.S. citizenship papers. The Canadian government provided free health care and the undocumented couple named the baby Ice Cuban. Exploiting his fraudulent dual citizenship Ice Cuban infiltrates government and amasses power until his secret is exposed and he renounces his Canadian citizenship in order to stifle a demand for unpaid taxes. The RCMP then takes ballin' action on their own.|
|VEEP ME! is a new political comedy series on GOPink-tv that explores the inner musings of Megabrain a Republican political thinker and strategist with a political endorsement batting average below the Mendoza line and a resulting inflated psychoanalyst bill. He finds redemption and joy attempting to rehabilitate has been broken down landslide loser politicians that everyone else has given up on.|
|Texans were surprised to wake up and find their land of freedom had been turned into a laboratory breeding ground of repressive government intrusion into citizen's personal lives. The in depth story of how the Texas Taliban accumulated power, suppressed opposition and rose to political dominance over an inattentive Texas electorate. Was Obama behind a successful conspiracy to make Texans look foolish?|
|The Scandal Channel continues it's series of investigations into unsubstantiated Presidential scandals that have generally been dismissed as false but who can say for certain? This episode looks into an allegation by a former luxury hotel butler involving secret meetings, ruined carpets and a four foot camel statue carved completely from butter and delivered by refrigerated truck after midnight.|
|In Rick Perry's WITLESS PROTECTION Ranger Rick goes undercover as a rogue rodeo clown at the Missouri State Fair in his hunt to find the only rodeo clown on the circuit who voted for President Obama among other crimes but finds himself on the receiving end of some fierce blow back from several large black Chicago bred bulls who confront him in the feed barn after the show.|
|Despite being elected unopposed on his home planet THUNE has gradually bowed to immense corporate largesse and partisan pressure to find himself hammering workers unions and being pressured to end essential healthcare benefits for his own constituents. THUNE's presidential ambitions are on the line as a potentially disasterous looming government shutdown could alienate his own source of life and power.|
|ELEPHANT SQUARES is a new prime time game show hosted by RNC Chairman Reince Priebus on which contestants will compete for large campaign contributions from several wealthy superPACS. Scripted party line GOP questions will be pre-selected by contestants so that each may deliver his or her most outrageous or funny response line with the intention of creating an endlessly looped sound bite that goes viral on the internet. If all goes well the familiar game show setting may also become the preferred debate format for the 2016 GOP Presidential nomination which may be held exclusively on the new FOX WHITE CHANNEL.|
|In the year 2014 two classes of people exist... the very wealthy who live on a pristine gated communities outside of Louisville and Memphis and the rest who live in a huge coal mining wasteland, a completely ruined and polluted section of Kentucky call Effluvium. The people of Effluvium are desperate to escape the area's toxic chemicals and noxious air and they critically need the Obamacare medical care available in other states but honor bound Southern gentlemen and conservative Republicans will stop at nothing to preserve their right to make huge profits and employ a non-union workforce that affords their luxurious lifestyle.|
|After accidentally maiming a woodcarver in a price dispute at an arts and crafts fair in the Pacific Northwest a remorseful Woolverine always wearing his trademark sheepskin befriends the dying woodcarver and learns his woodcarver skills quickly. After his death the Woolverine is visited by a slightly annoyed angelic apparition (played by Nancy Reagan) and he promises to commit all of his time to finishing a life size elephant carving for the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley California.|
|The Jungle Channel will debut JERSEY JUNGLE a new version of an old fashioned friendly dragon movie with a twist. Instead of an English countryside the setting is a restricted green zone area known as Jersey Jungle. Chris Christie plays an affectionate but misunderstood centaurpotamus who lives alone near the highway 880 offramp. Cory Booker through a stroke of fate and an auto accident stumbles upon the hybrid human creature. At first he is terrified but a bond of friendship develops as they set out to find others of Christie's nearly extinct species republicanus moderatis.|
|The season premiere on GOPink-TV finds the flamboyant trio on a New York City political outreach effort to emphasize these aren't your daddy's Republicans. The patrons of a flaming hot lower Village nightspot literally have their socks blown off in this episode which culminates with the contestants registering an incredible 173 new Republican voters. Host Rand Paul leads the libertarian fun.|
|Sean Hannity has been bumped from his 9 o'clock prime time slot on the FOX news network by the younger and lovelier Megyn Kelly but he has been given the opportunity to host a show to be called HANNITY DAYTIME on daytime television. Hannity has welcomed the opportunity as a challenge to expand his audience with the mostly female daytime audience on the FLOX news Chanel #5.|
|In a death spiral of unintended consequences a trio of inexperienced federal legislators engineer a government shutdown that leads to a cacophony of militant militia homegrown terrorist attacks and a paralyzed government response. After each suffers casualties in their own families the trio decides that they must help save the same government they helped to destroy.|
|Haunted by the assclown tattoo he got from an Alaska woman the deck seems stacked against Mitch McConnell winning his sixth Kentucky Senate championship belt. He's taking it from the left and the right and the left and the right and oooh! a low blow to the groin and Jesus he's an old man and for chrissakes they want him to have a body like a Chippendale dancer because the Democrats have an attractive female opponent.|
|Agent Whitey Whitehorse has made a career out of covering his butt at the agency but this season he is really up to his hips in out of control chaos. His plan is no plan but he can't come clean or he could lose his job and government health insurance prescription drug benefit that keeps his embarrassing orange skin condition under control. Whitey has vowed that being orange is not an option... no matter what.|
|With some friends you've got it all and nothing at all at the same time. A pat on the back and a wink at a snitch leads to one former pal being shoved in a ditch. In the new series BOARDWALK PAYBACK a dispute about a Kentucky Derby bet in an Atlantic City casino leads to brutal mayhem gratefully accompanied by occasional comic relief.|
|S P E C I A L --R E P O R T S|
George W. Bush
President Barack Obama
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|Romney Popularity Plummets Out Of Orbit! Exiled landslide loser may join asteroid belt. Mitt Romney's popularity numbers have continued to fall like lead bricks since his humiliating defeat on election day. November 28, 2012. Astral Ejection News|
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|Al-Awlaki's Final Seconds On Tape!|
Hellfire missile finds American-born terrorist in Yemen desert.
Anwar al-Awlaki was humming along in his just-washed 1988 Mercedes Benz on the main highway crossing the hot Yemeni desert in the Al Jawf region and talking jihad with Samir Kahn, his webmaster and only other known American-born al-Qaeda terrorist, and then...Byaaaaang! He's soot. President Obama announced the development adding we've run out of influential American-born radical al-Qaeda terrorists to vaporize.
October 6, 2011. Yemen Blockbuster Video.